Are you jealous of your friends? No?! Then you need new friends! You should be jealous of your friends and their accomplishments to create the drive you need to get you to your next destination and to do better. You see, jealousy is not always a bad thing; inspired, yet competitive, your mental state just needs to be balanced. I once read in a Facebook post that most of our closest relationships are a mixture of love, patience, trust, jealousy, etc. I didn’t understand the post at first, but reflecting on my own past experiences, they are absolutely right!
Just think about it – “What friend would you most likely be jealous of?” The friend that struggles to find a job and can’t seem to get their life together, or the friend that always seems to accomplish the many goals they always speak to you about? Jealousy is not your enemy, but your fuel. Now, get up and do something about it!
I admit it – I get jealous of my friends. I even catch myself comparing my life to theirs. It all started when I gave birth to my first born son and took a year off of work. It seemed like that was the year that everyone around me took off in their life. I had friends releasing books, featured on hit television shows and some traveling the world like I used to before I was pregnant. I became harder on myself thinking that I should be further than I am. But one day, I thought to myself, “Since this is a natural feeling for me, why not make the best of it and use these same feelings to be self-motivated to push harder to reach my goals?” Since then, I looked at jealousy from a different perspective. I looked at ways that I could still develop my personal brand during this down time. I suddenly felt a burst of energy and confidence to start writing blogs about my experience and creating a master plan for going after my life long dreams going into the new year. My question to you is, since jealousy is already an emotion that is a part of our makeup as human beings, I simply say embrace it? Are you with me?!
The key to success is none other than surrounding yourself around like-minded and successful individuals. Believe me you are going to be jealous of some of them, but this is very crucial to your success as an Entrepreneur. You do not necessarily have to be around individuals that work in your same industry, or own “Fortune 500” companies. What’s most important is the people around you the most should stand behind characteristics you can jealously admire and support like driven, optimistic or consistent – creative, focused or all of the above. Believe it or not, your friends’ characteristics are more influential to your success than anything else. If you follow a bunch of bad people, don’t think you are going to pull them up – they are going to pull you down. I have seen it time after time. Now, you get it. Jealousy as an ambition fuel is a good thing.
I am not saying you should drop your unsuccessful friends. I am not saying that at all. In life, we all go through our trials and tribulations, and everyone’s path to success is never the same. What I am saying is that we all have those individuals in our life that tend to be chronically negative and never have anything positive to say about what’s going on in their life. Now, those people need to be dropped! One of my favorite books is called, “The Power of Focus” by Jack Canfield. This book dedicates an entire chapter on advising us to stay away from TOXIC people. These individuals delight in bursting your positive bubble and take a great pleasure in dumping all of their negative baggage on your plate. Reading this chapter, I thought is there anyone I should cut off in my circle? Or Am I inheriting anyone’s bad habits? I began to do an intensive vet on everyone, and I did find that there were individuals that just were not healthy for me to be around mentally, physically and emotionally; and resultantly, I began to separate myself from those people. Ending relationships with some of my colleagues was not an easy task, but I knew it was time. In the end, I am glad that I did.
Devote to being your friend’s number one supporter! Now, it is time to look at your friends that really have it goin’ on. Don’t just stand there and be jealous of them; root for them on their journey! Humble yourself and ask them for advice and tips on how they stay motivated and consistent. Don’t let insecurities prevent you from reaching desirable goals in your own future. Maturing is key to getting rid of the emptiness you may you feel and it will direct you to feeling empowered by the success around you. The golden rule is: the people you spend most of your time with make you. You are in total control here. So, get jealous and get even – put yourself in a more positive and engaging environment.